Flying dog turd

This might be the best piece of news I've read in a long time. The real question is, how do you become famous enough where displaying a giant inflatable dog turd becomes art? I probably could have come up with that when I was 5, but no one would have cared. Oh well, maybe someday I can put all my excel spreadsheets on display or one of my smelly work shoes or something (which are disgusting by the way, does anyone else's work shoes start smelling like an undiscovered species of crab after a year or so?).

GENEVA (AFP) - A giant inflatable dog turd by American artist Paul McCarthy blew away from an exhibition in the garden of a Swiss museum, bringing down a power line and breaking a greenhouse window before it landed again, the museum said Monday.

The art work, titled "Complex S(expletive..)", is the size of a house. The wind carried it 200 metres (yards) from the Paul Klee Centre in Berne before it fell back to Earth in the grounds of a children's home, said museum director Juri Steiner.

The inflatable turd broke the window at the children's home when it blew away on the night of July 31, Steiner said. The art work has a safety system which normally makes it deflate when there is a storm, but this did not work when it blew away.

Steiner said McCarthy had not yet been contacted and the museum was not sure if the piece would be put back on display.

How to (not) cure hiccups

In the spirit of a wiki-how, I would like to inform you of how to cure hiccups (or not to, depending on how you interpret this story). On Saturday my friend was suffering from a long stint of hiccups that were on and off for many hours. They didn't go on for days like that girl on the news a few years ago and they weren't reminiscent of a teradactyl screech like yours truly's hiccups, but they were annoying none-the-less. Now, said friend was a bit intoxicated at the time and was going on about it and finally Sean decided to tell her that the sure fire way to cure hiccups is to "massage your uvula." For those of you who think I typed "vulva" and are grossed out and also a little intrigued, no need to get too excited because he was talking about the dangling piece of tissue in the back of the throat (or the "thingy" as my Mom would call it).

About 15 minutes later I had to use the restroom and my friend decided to join me. It was a one staller so we were in there together and as I was relieving myself she decided to take Sean's advice and massage her uvula to relieve herself. Let's see...was it two or three seconds later that she ralphed all over the sink? I was personally disgusted because I can't stand puke; I literally cry every time I have the misfortune of experiencing it. After making my thoughts on the situation clear (WTF are you doing and?!?) we made our way back to the table and I must have looked traumatized because everyone in our party immediately asked what happened. I relayed the story and meanwhile Sean is in the corner laughing hysterically because he obviously was playing a prank on her. When everyone realized what happened they were cracking up (and my stomach was still turning). My friend was strangely unphased by the whole episode and seemed perfectly happy because her hiccups were in fact gone.

So if drinking water upside down, holding your breath and eating a spoonful of sugar don't work the next time those pesky hiccups are ailing you, if you have the stomach for it try massaging your vulva (wait, I mean uvula).